Wednesday, October 14, 2009

WHO ARE YOU CALLING "SENIOR"?


"How old are you?" the checkout clerk asks. I scan my purchases -- blouse, dress, jeans, candles, PedEgg (are those regulated?) -- trying to see what has alarmed her and elicited the question. No booze, no cigarettes, no guns. What is she after?

"I'm 53. Why?"

"It's Senior Discount Day today."

"That's the first time anyone has ever asked me if I was old enough for the senior discount," I reply, frankly stunned.

The woman behind me -- about my age -- laughs, and says, "My first time was last week. Rather disheartening, isn't it? My daughter recently asked if I was going to move into town, so I could be closer to a hospital."

"Yes, my daughter is anxiously waiting to take away my car keys at the first sign of 'elderly' driving," I respond.

Hmmmph. I don't know how I suddenly became old. My mother-in-law once remarked, "I feel like the same girl I always was, but I look in the mirror and can't find myself." I understand that experience. But still, do I look like I'm eligible for senior discounts? Maybe in the neck, where, if I pinch the skin together, it stays. I do stand in front of the mirror sometimes and pull my face back to see what might happen if I got a facelift. And yes, all my body parts are situated a bit south of their original position. But still.
I'm attaching a picture from last year. Please tell me how old you think I look.

Meanwhile, I'm going to take a nap.

2 comments:

  1. How old do you think I look? Ha! As if anyone's going to go near that with a 10-foot pole. Except Bayra, of course, but she's a D-I-L!

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  2. Wow, I never would have asked you! I would have assumed you were about 40-45 like Bayra said. Maybe you can feel better knowing that the lady was told to ask that to anyone she thought looked over 35 :)

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